All Systems Go

I’m here, again.
You’ve gotten me
out of my tower.
And wasn’t that
the point, after all?

Everyone keeps
cornering me,
prodding for details,
clues about my
oh so glamorous life.

And I find I have
so much to say.

I hear myself replying
in a tired, but hopeful
tone of voice that seems
foreign to my ears and
I constantly find myself
smiling, shrugging, thinking

“When did that happen?
And how do I keep it?”
I am going to iron clothes tonight in my tower. Because I wasn’t home last night, and I won’t be tomorrow, or the day after that, or the weekend after that. Because that’s life now.

“I’m tired.” The response to every question, every emotion, every person who ever asks me anything, no matter how mundane. And it’s still true. But I’m not tired because I’m forced to do things I don’t want to do with people I don’t want to do them with anymore, trying to convince myself and everyone around me that it’s what I wanted.

Don’t get me wrong. Life’s not perfect and there’s still a lot of people I can’t stand and things I wish I didn’t have to do, in my daily life. But we’re heading in the right direction…


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